The bad acting. The overly dramatic musical score. The not-so-true “Based on a True Story” mention flashing on a black background in the first scene. Lifetime movies are part of our country’s dismal pop culture history (if you can even call it that), and they play constant reminders that yes, teenage girls make pacts in high school to purposely get pregnant, and crimes can be depicted as sexy soap operas.
Netflix officially released some A&E episodes and Lifetime movies today to make up for their huge BBC loss yesterday. This list of Lifetime movies isn’t half bad; they’ve even included some headlining-making ones starring the likes of Lindsay Lohan. We’ve picked out five that either caused the most stir when they first aired or that are the most bearable to watch with a beer in hand. At the most you can get drunk and make fun of these or make up drinking games to accompany them (shot every time Hayden Panettiere is referred to as ‘Foxy Knoxy’). So grab your mom or any other random human he enjoys these, and embark on the sturdy lame voyage that is Lifetime movies.
Amanda Knox: Murder on Trial in Italy (2011)
Lifetime loves them killer ladies (or accused killer ladies), so an Amanda Knox biopic was of course going to happen. Starring Hayden Panettiere as Amanda, an American who is accused of murdering her British roommate during her stay in Italy, Amanda Knox: Murder on Trial in Italywas met with criticism almost everywhere. Knox supporters believed Lifetime made Knox out to seem manipulative and provocative, the same assumptions the media made all through the much-publicized trial. Knox’s verdict was ultimately appealed in 2013, and is currently repairing her life and reputation, with no help from Lifetime.
Liz & Dick (2012)
Casting one of the biggest train wrecks in Hollywood history was a smart move, but Lindsay Lohan’s attempt to bring to life the dramatic passionate romance of Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton falls flat, like her acting. Lindsay looks like a coked-out 20-something (cause she is) playing house in Liz & Dick, with a much more mature-looking Grant Bowler (poor soul). You can tell Lifetime is trying their very best to make their viewer sympathize with Taylor’s story, but what they really accomplish is a universal shared sympathy and embarrassment for Lohan’s career.